Sunday, October 4, 2009

The Seven Deadly Sins (or one night on the town with Joe)

Ah vice, I love the stuff. Who doesn't? I mean really, aside from the whole moral code thing (which is sketchy at best), we'd all pretty much do anything if we thought we could get away with it. So dear readers, in the spirit of the Lord's day, I give you my break down of the pros and cons of each of the 7 deadly sins. Here goes;

The steamiest of the 7 deadly sins and one of my personal favorites. I don't see much harm in lust when it is consensual. Would the human population be anywhere near as large as it is today if boys didn't long for girls? Maybe lust then is merely a function of biology? That said, one has to control their lust. Ahem, ahem, David Letterman, those randy dandies in the GOP, every 15-year-old boy with a National Geographic, Vaseline and a facecloth. We just can't go around humping anything and everything fellas. We must be selective and controlled in our lust. Then, I can tell you, there is very little, if anything, that is better.

Another of my very favorite 7 deadly sins. Who doesn't like to overindulge from time to time? Whether it be cookies, good beer, fancy clothes, Tic Tacs, everyone has a substance that makes them lose all self-control. Screw the notion of everything in moderation. OK sometimes you can over do it, but your body is pretty adept at letting you know when you have consumed one beer, one Twinkie or made one trip to the buffet table too many. If you consume too much it always catches up to you. Drink lots of water, Advil, and sometimes a greasy breakfast help.

Gluttony becomes more problematic when it goes beyond the personal, and is institutionalized. Things like Valentines Day, chocolate chip cookie dough, crude oil, and Walmart are the result of gluttony on the grand scale. Scary, scary stuff. Shoo you, stay way from my Big Mac and Super-sized fries. Shoo!

Greed is one of the ugly ones. Similar in many ways to gluttony. Greed has more reach than its gluttonous cousin who is just pigging out. Greed spreads like a disease, it stinks up the soul quickly. We all suffer from it, it a very human disease. It might be the one thing that keeps us from building utopic human societies. Geesh, maybe greed is a sin? I know I don't much care for it as a trait. A boo to greed.

The laziest sin of the bunch. The one I tend to partake in the most. Seriously who doesn't like to sit in their pj's all day and 'write'? That's living the dream man, gimme that and tons of coffee, man I am in heaven. But where was I? Oh yes, sloth. Um, yawn, scratch,...zzzzzz, snort... not a sin. zzzzzz.

The worst of them all. Its the evil slime monster that lives in everyone's past. It can jump out at any moment. It is hard to control and unpredictable. Basically it encompasses every last bit of human shittiness. It's the rock you shouldn't look under, the truths to all lies. The yucky stuff, you know, the stuff that all good stories are made of.
'God damn you, God damn you all to hell. ~ Charleton Heston - Planet of the Apes, oh hell look at here:

An ugly but almost unavoidable human trait. Like most vices envy just sorta sneaks up on you. You could wake up happy as a clam at you your lot in life then, WHAM, a look at the TV, or out the window, instantly the I want reflex springs into gear. Envy and greed are basically the human gag reflex of want. Me, me, me, I saw it first, I want it, it is mine. If they have it, why don't I have it? Where does it all end though? I bet the fella that has it all is the loneliest fucker on Earth. Hey Bill Gates if your reading this, I will be your buddy dude, I will come over and play with your toys.

In its original meaning 'desire to be more important or attractive than others, failing to acknowledge the good work of others, and excessive love of self' (wiki) sure kinda icky, but not all that removed from vanity, or narcissism which yes, are ugly, but always fleeting. Crimes we do to ourselves.

As for the modern meaning of pride: A sense of one's own proper dignity or value; self-respect. (dictionary) They seem like things people might want to strive for. USA USA USA! Yikes, did I mention how scary pride was on a grand scale? No? Oh forget it. I am gonna go partake in some sloth. Good night to you. God bless.

p.s. Why aren't the 7 virtues pushed and taught? (yay wiki!) Wouldn't it be better to know how to do good? Just saying is all.


  1. This is simply my favorite blog in which I look forward to each and every morning with bated breath.

    Will the post be political or risque I ask myself in anticipation of the page loading? Will there be an ethical dilemma in the mix or better still will it be spiced with religion and humor all in one?

    You are a wordsmith in the highest degree. Love it :)

  2. Thank you so much for the kind words. It means the world to me that people enjoy the stuff I write. :)

  3. As a minister, I approve of this blog entry :-)

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  5. Huzzah! Even some folks in the 'business' dig what I am saying.

  6. As i suspected , something inspiring and to the point was to be found here @ The NAD on a particularly uninspiring Monday..GREAT stuff Joe..cheers mate !

  7. Thanks Brian. This one kept me up late into the night, as I suppose most encounters with vice and sin do.

    Oh and hey, I received your package in the mail. YAY! and thanks.

  8. Joseph, it figures a man would interpret lust in a sexual context. All jokes aside, I like this one. We are all a composition of these energies. Our goal, as with anything, is to achieve balance. I still have a lot of work to do :-)

  9. How is lust anything but sexual??? Hmmm. If lust were meant to mean longing or want, then it would easily fit in with gluttony, greed or envy.

    We all have a lot of work to do. I figure the best we can do is hope that the worst of our sins are self directed.